Sunday, March 12, 2006

The "What the hell is this supposed to be about" Post

Once upon a time, and for no readily apparent reason, there lived a small cartoon caricature called Timmy.

Timmy loved football, meat pies, and cartoon porn - particularly that Japanese stuff. One day, as Timmy prepared for his date with some Japanese sheila he'd met on the intraweb thingy, he realized that his blues seemed to be bleeding into the other colours and his private parts were all blurry and censoured-looking. Perhaps this was caused by an evil government plot to subvert the freedomness illustrations like Timmy have enjoyed for so long, or perhaps it was because of all the Japanese cartoon porn. If there was one thing Timmy was certain of, it was that evil government moles were watching his every move, mostly because of his ties to the revolutionary forces and his history of cartoon violence, but also because they really wanted to get their hands on some of his porn.

Ha! It would be a slightly less sweltering day in hell before this little two-dimensional pervert would give up a single scrap of titilation, no matter how badly drawn. And anyway...

It is at almost precisely this moment that Timmy the Deviant was cancelled to make way for Henry the Adequate, superhero, thereby proving once more what morons those morons in program planning are. To this day rare copies of Timmy the Deviant sell for almost twenty three cents in grotty little porn emporiums out back, behind the public toilets, just near the old railway line. You know the one.

6 Comments:

Blogger Lorraine said...

Oh wow, Timmy the Deviant meets Henry the Adequate, I'm impressed

11:50 pm  
Blogger carouselle10 said...

Emporiums??? I thought they were the public toilets!!

8:10 am  
Blogger Lorraine said...

So sorry I had to remove the link to you, as some of my viewers could not see the photo as well because of it. I erased you with deep regret!

6:23 pm  
Anonymous Saqqara said...

Heheh. Just want to say I've been following your story for quite sometime now. Keep it up!

8:39 pm  
Blogger corpus said...

Finally, a nemisis!

8:46 am  
Blogger Ben said...

Lorraine:
It's ok. There are millions of links to Henry. Ok, three.

carouselle:
Multi function devices.

Saqqara:
Thank you.

Isis:
Timmy returns in:
The Return of Timmy the Deviant
The Revenge of Timmy the Deviant
Timmy the Deviant, Sith Lord.

8:52 am  

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