Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Henry and the Clue

My name is Henry the Adequate, and I am a superhero.

Today I have found a clue to the source of recent attacks on my person. The clue is subtle and could very easily be mistaken for yet another attack on my person - particularly due to all of the shooting and exploding and cries of "Die, Henry the Adequate, die!!"

But my exceptional brain allows me to see behind the fascade of mindless violence and naked agression, to fold back the veil of rampant hatred, and expose the deep-seated and cunningly disguised intelligence that is directing all of this other stuff that I have just referred at.

I dive for cover while simultaneously spraying the enemy with liquid fire and also priming my twin rocket launchers, and also wishing that just for once I could dive for cover onto a nice soft mattress instead of the concrete and/or asphalt that generally breaks my fall. My fall is then broken by asphalt that appears to have had a crate of bottles smashed onto it. The bottles may have contained acid of some kind, judging by the intense sensations that now greet me, mockingly, apparently making some kind of point about being grateful for what you have.

"Foolish Human," mocks the gleaming robot, mockingly, "Did you think that the mere destruction of the multiverse would halt the Robot League of Chaos!" This is the clue I have mentioned earlier, in case you hadn't noticed. I am uncertain what it means, but surely even such cryptic words cannot long withstand my amazing mental powers.

Then my rockets roar defiantly, and the robot disappears in a massive explosion. Behind me several cars are on fire, possibly due to the flaming exhaust from my rockets, or possibly due to some kind of spontaneous combustion. At this point the cause is vague and uncertain, and, anyway, who can say what is really real. Also, there is superheroing to be done, and I do not have time to stand around arguing over who is responsible for some kind of alleged wanton destruction which may or may not have occurred.

I use my super powers of being somplace else.

6 Comments:

Blogger carouselle10 said...

Deny deny deny. Henry should go into politics.

3:36 pm  
Blogger Ben said...

I want Henry's super powers of being someplace else.

3:44 pm  
Blogger Lorraine said...

Is he naked?

7:20 pm  
Blogger Ben said...

Under all those clothes he is.

7:43 am  
Blogger Lorraine said...

You're kidding!!! me too

11:35 pm  
Blogger Ben said...

Coincidence? I think not.

7:43 am  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home