Monday, January 30, 2006

The Wisdom of Henry #42

Dealing with children:
Shout. Shout louder. Shout louder still. Club with a convenient lead pipe. Rinse and repeat.

13 Comments:

Blogger Lorraine said...

I'm appalled!!! at having chuckled
just how many kids do you have anyway?

11:52 pm  
Anonymous Miss Ann Thrope said...

Well said! Bravo!

12:51 am  
Blogger Joe Brochin said...

Yes, this type of advice can only come from the true and wonderful expeirence of raising children. Not from the mouth of some TV pundit that has never even had the priviledge of dealing with a child for longer than a 1 hour counseling session. I ha
ve now added Henry to my favorites.

Joseph Brochin
http://joebrochin.greatestjournal.com/

1:46 am  
Anonymous mu-tiger said...

hehe. i always love it when in exasperation i say something like, "i'd like to pinch off his head!" and get a barrage of self-righteous parenting advice from childless advisors. i hope they have the pleasure of dealing with adolescence from a parental perspective; it's a whole hell of a lot different when you go through it as a parent, with your child, then going through it as a child. And my child *is* a good child, none of this drinking or doping or sexing at the tender age of 14...when his friends started some or all aforementioned at TWELVE?! WTF?

My child is just mouthy. And questions all authority like i've taught him. Not so fun when i happen to be that authority...in the end, i suppose that's a good thing...someone tell me the grey hair i'm seeing is uhm, elegant, or something, please! :P

The other day, we were in the car, and after a lengthy discussion on the whys and wherefores of a particular discussion, which were quite true and logical, he defiantly said, "Well, i'll run away then!" Having heard that the third time, i pulled over to the sidewalk and said, "You want to run away? Get out now."

He was horrified. He also chose not to get out of the car. Then about a half hour later, he apologised.

Poor parenting skills? A childless 70 year old friend thought so, when i related the tale to her.

4:09 am  
Blogger Ben said...

Lorraine:
A few :)

Miss Ann:
Thank you.

Joe:
You guessed it, I do indeed have children, though I am beginning to suspect that the lead pipe is affecting their intellects. Perhaps I should switch to a steel pipe.

mu-tiger:
I have no parenting skills, so won't comment on yours :)
My kids constantly question authority (me), no matter how much I try to beat it out of them. Oh, and that grey hair you're seeing is elegant btw.

PS I'm lying about beating my kids, in case you hadn't guessed. That's just in case the government is reading this, assuming anyone in the government(any government) is capable of human communication.

6:42 am  
Blogger SquareGirl said...

And never forget the tongue clamps.

8:39 am  
Blogger Ben said...

I forgot about those.

12:24 pm  
Blogger SquareGirl said...

what kind of pattoner are you anyway??? I'm beginnig to doubt that you ever really did patton children's tongue clamps afterall...

5:06 pm  
Blogger Ben said...

Shhh. I have the rest of them fooled. Please keep it to yourself :)

5:45 pm  
Blogger corpus said...

Good advice. I'll remember that someday when I have kids and they 'accidently' put me on trial for killing-oops, I mean teaching them a lesson.

9:39 pm  
Blogger Ben said...

It's just natural selection in action, your honour.

10:17 pm  
Blogger Lorraine said...

do you have any idea how long it would take a govt task force to analyze your blog? Your children would be raising their own children torturing them in some Henryish brand of punishment. Ahhh what a legacy!

10:33 pm  
Blogger Ben said...

I do what I can.

10:41 pm  

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