Monday, December 12, 2005

Homecoming

My name is Henry the Adequate, and I am a superhero.

I exit the trans-dimensional portal and fall heavily, jarring my shoulder and causing my trigger finger to convulse somewhat. The quantum particle accelerator discharges in a blinding flash of energy. Fortunately no damage appears to have been done. At least none to speak of. The hyperdimensional portal flickers and disappears with a weird sucking sound, but that was probably going to happen anyway.

I stand up and examine my surroundings. This appears to be some kind of grocery store. People are looking at me strangely for some reason. Perhaps it is the bloodstained dishevelled state of my clothing, or the nasty looking weapon I am carrying, or possibly the fact that I just fell through a large black nothingness where the ceiling used to be. It matters not.

I leave the store and head for home. This turns out to be less trivial than I had imagined. You know, I've heard that the French can be arrogant, and obnoxious, and that they will pretend not to understand English just to annoy tourists, but all of those I spoke to were polite and helpful, and quite willing to converse in English. Maybe it is just my winning personality, although this could also have something to do with the bloodstains, and the nasty looking weapon I am threatening them with. A very helpful chap even gives me his phone.

"Hello?"

"June, it's me."

"Henry! Where are you? What happened?"

"I'm in Paris, apparently."

"What happened? How did you get to Paris? Did you defeat the robotics guy?"

"Maybe I defeated them. It's hard to say."

"What do you mean?"

"Well...."

"What?"

"I may have destroyed the multiverse."

"What?!"

"It was an accident."

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