Monday, November 28, 2005

Henry at June's

My name is Henry the Adequate, and I am a superhero.

I knock and wait.

"Henry, come in." June waves me to a seat in her living room. Pieces of evil puppet creature are scattered about the place.

"What have you found out?" I sit and look at the mess, my super-senses probing probingly into all of the crannies and most of the nooks. There are some nooks you really don't want to look into. Louise appears to be examining several of those as we speak. She glances up from her work and is about to say something potentially significant, but that won't happen until the next paragraph. So you should probably more on and read that right about.... now.

"Henry you moron, why didn't you show me this earlier?" Or possibly it won't be all that significant.


"Look at the chemical residue here."

"Hmmm," I nod knowingly as I scan the object with my super-microscopic vision. "Looks like some kind of makeup to me Dizzy."

"Not my finger you idiot," she explains considerately and patiently. "Look here..."

"Is that some sort of poison?" My hyper-microminiaturoid magnifying super-vision shows an abundance of strangely alien particles that seem vaguely familiar.

"It's the same poison as was in that pizza you didn't eat the other night."

"Yeah... didn't eat... that's right. Cause eating poison pizza would be stupid." [Note to self: destroy pizza box when I get home.]

"Did you check out the pizzeria Henry?"

"Yeah. It's gone. I went over there the other night, as soon as you guys left my place. Didn't order pizza and watch TV, or get my stomach pumped at the hospital, or anything like that. Just went straight off to check on Puppeteer Joe's."

"You mean they moved out?"

"Yes, and I may also have burned it to the ground. I don't remember."

"Damn." My sister Louise is a little upset. We both are.

"Yeah, I really liked their pizza."


Blogger corpus said...

"...My hyper-microminiaturoid magnifying super-vision..."

Hey! And you said he didn't have any super-powers. Ah-ha!

11:45 am  
Blogger Ben said...

Henry has many many many super-powers. Some of them may even exist outside of his imagination.

11:53 am  
Blogger Lorraine said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

11:44 pm  
Blogger Ben said...

Henry can x-ray himself whenever he likes, due to his super-powered auto-modulating x-ray vision.

7:04 am  

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